Hello Deception

Nothing like an English beach.

2010-09-16T12:32:00.000+01:00

Captain Jack Sparrow

2010-07-29T10:07:00.000+01:00

I was beyond excited for this!

Just no

2010-07-25T02:40:00.000+01:00

As far as hobbies tend to go

2010-07-23T13:00:00.002+01:00

I have few and far between. I have a lust for fashions and beauty, yet not enough of a passion for me to put forth my ideas and opinions as such. No ambition to spark another copy-cat blog of what I wore today, yadda, yadda. But this of course is not what I want. Most certainly, I do revel in such online narcissism and I appreciate those who have the ability and confidence to explore their different garmentary avenues, but I for one cannot and will not follow this path. (Seriously, who needs another today I wore a. b. c.)

Anyway, this is beyond the point for this post. It dawned on me today, more heavily than before, that I have no skills or hobbies, bar the ability to read a text and either be engrossed by it, turned on if you may (in regards to awakening my senses and evoking a driven persona) or simply lost in an "I don't actually give a fuck". But this is all I have, pretty much all I've ever had. An ability with words, sometimes awkwardly structured, but that's it. Maybe that's what adds an essence of quirk to my writings. I hope. Do you have any idea how annoying it is to see others express themselves in various forms and fortifications, be it via music, fashion, generally being an extrovert, and then there is me. Nothing worth writing home about. Sweet F.A.

2010-02-15T18:37:00.001Z

I still cannot get over how weird it is to see my face plastered over a magazine, and now 3rd Floor's personal blogspot and twitter.

http://3rdfloorpublication.blogspot.com

https://twitter.com/3rdfloorissue3

2010-02-15T18:28:00.002Z

Pleasantly surprised by the events of February 14th which is rare considering the differences I have with the over-priced excuse of a day. But that cast aside I can only say I enjoyed it most reverently. Red velvet cupcakes were made, although the amount of red food colouring needed to achieve the burgundy depths was beyond ridiculous, however the outcome was received with applause. More so the dinner Adam had paid for was a sheer culinary delight. Loch Fyne most certainly needs another visit, and soon.

Now however a week of work awaits, which for once I can't put off as Adam is not about to distract me. He's on tour by the way. Boo.

STYLE SOCIETY

2010-02-09T11:51:00.002Z

The blog, Sarah-Leigh’s Style Files, presents the first of its eponymous events STYLE SOCIETY. The party aims to bring Southampton’s (and beyond!) creative minds together for an evening of music, drinks, dancing, creativity and to raise some much needed cash for Oxfam.

From Solent’s Fashion and Design faculty, to our city’s designers, budding vintage enthusiasts and simply the downright trendy – all are welcome to Southampton's very first fashion-dedicated evening.

There on the night:

• Live bands will keep us entertained, while later DJ Ryan B will be spinning a mixture of 80’s hip hop and funk

• An auction with a host of amazing gifts to aid Oxfam – Style Society aims to build a new classroom providing education to an under privileged community - look out for exclusive gifts from the likes of Reebok, Addict and Hepwrights

• Jam-packed gift bags for the ‘best dressed’ or ‘vintage fabulous’, to be awarded to one super-stylish guy, and one glamorous girl on the night

• A ‘surprise’ fashion extravaganza, courtesy of stylist Sophie Penn

• Resident photographers will be snapping your outfits and asking all about them around the bar and in our photobooth.

• An area of Orange Rooms gives way to the HEPWRIGHT’S VINTAGE LOUNGE – a chill out come dressing up area with the finest stock from Hepwright’s vintage emporium (store located on Queen’s Terrace, Southampton)

• Gallery areas and live art (from the likes of Iris Hill's Lisa Jean) & DIY crafts, plus many an activity to get involved with! Not to mention a host of Oxfam's vintage stock to rifle through!

For more info email stylesociety2010@gmail.com.

2010-02-09T11:49:00.000Z

2010-02-08T16:48:00.001Z

Is the natural state of the child within 19thC fiction represented as inherently innocent, inherently sinful or as something that blurs the simplicity of these binary oppositions?

Ugh. This essay is awful. If I am completely honest I haven’t learned anything this semester. Is this a reflection of bad teaching or my lack of understanding? It’s most certainly not the latter.

On a better note Canterbury are playing Joiners with Twin Atlantic and fellow friends band Viva Sleep On Wednesday 10th Feb. Check it out!

Worker Bees

2010-02-07T22:47:00.003Z

Might be high time I pulled my finger out and actually got down and dirty with some Uni work for once. So far I'm relying too much on blagging it. And lets be frank, blagging it doesn't get you anywhere. Besides my lecturers have high hope in me, so surely it's only polite to ensure I do just that. Right?

Currently waiting about so I can pick up my housemate from Uni. She's been on a trip to Roma. Oh how I miss it. Other than that this week has consisted of hours of procrastination, music and drink fueled nights, friends and lovers...well lover.

You're unbelievable

2010-01-11T17:24:00.003Z

If there is one thing that gets my goat it has to be people who are so un-original that they have to use photos of others as a resemblance of themselves. Granted we all have our insecurities that are beyond superfluous, but is there really such a need to nab someone else's image just to make yourself look better. No. Because if you think about it, it is not you. It never will be you. So get the hell over it and sort it out.

2010-01-04T14:14:00.003Z

It's probably about high time that I got back onto the swings and roundabouts of the 'blogosphere'. New year, new start as they say.

This year I solemnly swear I shall keep on top of my University work and work to the best of my means. Which of course has already gone halfway out of the window, considering I should be doing an essay right this nano-second.

I think I should maybe save a bit of money this year...pigs might fly.

Oh and to generally just savour every mouth watering moment 2010 has to offer.

Bruno Dayan

2009-09-02T22:35:00.005+01:00

Guy Bourdin

2009-09-02T19:31:00.002+01:00

Tous

2009-09-02T17:35:00.001+01:00

2009-09-02T17:25:00.005+01:00

Such Great Heights

2009-09-02T17:00:00.001+01:00

Aren't they just perfect.

21st October

2009-09-01T15:31:00.002+01:00

The '59 Sound

2009-09-01T09:46:00.000+01:00

CFC

2009-08-25T22:45:00.001+01:00

I love LOOKBOOK.

Wimborne

2009-08-24T21:15:00.004+01:00

This week has been the best by far this summer.

I miss college

2009-08-11T14:53:00.000+01:00

Truth be told

2009-08-08T00:04:00.004+01:00

Adam Alexander Guest I miss you.

This little piggy cried all the way home

2009-08-07T11:40:00.009+01:00

My mother has caught the dreaded swine flu. 'Swine' makes it sounds a lot worse than it actually is. Therefore my return to Southampton has been delayed by a week. Rather annoying considering I had made plans for this week, c'est la vie. On the plus side I'll be saving a lot of money, which I'm obviously not rolling around in as of late, oh how I long for loan day! And just spending time with mother, at a distance of course will be a nice change considering it's rare to send so much time alone with her.

Yes this will be a long week but I'm sure what lies at the end will be thoroughly rewarding. I've missed Adam dearly. Three weeks is far too long for my liking, but a week in Wimbourne with him will be ravishing.

Also the University fashion magazine 3rd Floor is available in R. D. Franks magazine store in Oxford Circus which is notorious for selling a wide array of high flying fashion magazines, so I feel somewhat proud that my face will be appearing amongst the faces of the young and beautiful renown models.

Cash in the attic?

2009-08-03T21:45:00.003+01:00

The attic stores a series of wondrous little finds. Today's being a camera. A Canon AE-1. Which belonged to my father...So we're looking at it being 30 years old at least. But I've no idea how to use it...Help?

Two Dead Boys

2009-07-12T18:41:00.003+01:00

One fine day in the middle of the night,
Two dead boys got up to fight,
Back to back they faced each other,
Drew their swords and shot each other,

One was blind and the other couldn't, see
So they chose a dummy for a referee.
A blind man went to see fair play,
A dumb man went to shout "hooray!"

A paralysed donkey passing by,
Kicked the blind man in the eye,
Knocked him through a nine inch wall,
Into a dry ditch and drowned them all,

A deaf policeman heard the noise,
And came to arrest the two dead boys,
If you don't believe this story’s true,
Ask the blind man he saw it too!

I completely forgot about this folk rhyme until I noticed it being mentioned in the song titles of The Chariot.

Man scandal..(?)

2009-07-10T20:25:00.003+01:00

I've quite missed master Hayward. He mentioned this photo while at dinner tonight. I just had to bring it to everyone's attention once more.

Heading for the sun...

2009-06-30T22:26:00.002+01:00

There is a reason I am pale. This reason being that I get burnt.
All I want is to not look so sickly white.
Fail.

I miss Southampton. Essex is boring me.

3 sleeps to go.

He's alright

2009-06-23T17:05:00.002+01:00

Bounteous

2009-06-12T16:03:00.001+01:00

It seems to be that while content I rarely write.
That is all.

3rd Floor Magazine

2009-06-03T16:49:00.006+01:00

I've been lucky enough to be involved in the development and final publication of the Fashion Dept Magazine called 3rd Floor. These are the images of the front cover and article within in whic h I feature. Safe to say I am so chuffed with this!

Graduate Fashion Show

2009-05-28T17:39:00.003+01:00

A quick preview of the Southampton Solent Graduate Fashion show I took part in.
Absolutely immense evening.

Eros

2009-05-28T01:52:00.004+01:00

All is gradually piling up in the masses whilst I'm being pummeled into the ground beneath. In other words everything is getting on top of me as of late. A sense of overwhelming loneliness if you like. Arguably I have a plethora of fantastic friends around me as always but in knowing that my excuse of a personal, shared 'love' life is beyond the realms of existence my feelings have been located in the proverbial shitter.

When everyone around you is in a glaze of joyous embrace you cannot help but be mildly jealous. Of course I am happy (what a God awful word) for those who are but it is constantly making me rebuke myself in that I cannot keep hold of anything of a similar stature. Or more likely that I am not of worth for anyone.

I chase those who do not appreciate what I have to offer yet I dismiss those who would more than likely take on my scornful criticisms and evidently sarcastic undertones, because they would argue it is what makes me, me.

In addition to my lack luster love life I seem to be in passionate relations with a fair friend of mine. Interesting considering the other week was the first I've heard of it, unless of course I am being slipped the odd Rohypnol in my daily cups of tea and therefore jading my memory.

Lunching this week with one particular has been enjoyable and although not a great deal is occurring right now there are dots on the horizon of which I can eagerly cross off and those in which I need to pursue and fulfill.

GFS

2009-05-19T22:53:00.001+01:00

Southampton Solent Graduate Fashion Show tomorrow.
So much can go wrong.
Shitting a brick. Majorly.

Pass me the pen

2009-05-01T01:46:00.002+01:00

I have resorted to pen and paper for the time being.
Personal consistency.

Careless Whisper

2009-04-23T01:18:00.000+01:00

I knew it was coming.
Put it down to woman's initiative.

Last night

2009-02-13T19:39:00.002Z

I was horrendously drunk.
And I vomited on a bar maid.
I feel savage today.

Compliance Defiance

2009-02-07T01:17:00.004Z

I still have no idea at this moment in time. A straight cut answer would be fantastic but instead I am still in the lurch.

I am in love

2009-01-26T02:09:00.001Z

with Jeniferever.

A pure reflection of the now. Magnificent.

Simple summary

2008-12-29T12:40:00.003Z

2008
Wasn't amazing.

2009
Will be better.

The Fashion Debate...

2008-12-23T15:16:00.004Z

I have a favour to ask you avid readers out there. (You're probably not an avid reader...)
Anyway for Uni I'm doing a 10 page article/newsight piece. Its on something that I feel strongly about which at the moment is the effects of fashion on their targeted discourse. So It would be a great help if I could get your opinions on fashion itself or more specifically the effects of fashion blogging and magazines on young men and women.

If it could be around 100 - 200 words that would be fantastic. Names won't be used it's merely for my secondary research and opinions. Just comment with your response!

Thanks.

So get off the bandwagon and put down the handbook

2008-12-21T22:31:00.005Z

I swear everyday I am coming across a plethora of 'fashion blogs'. Now don't get me wrong I love new clothes and shoes, God I love shoes, and I love piecing things together, but do we really need more girls taking pictures of themselves in outfits everyday, showing us their new buys and their take on the 'latest trends'? Do I really need someone to set out the guidelines on what I would look good in? Hardly. I can happily rifle through the odd blog which breathes some life into some god awful garments, but when browsing through the links on the page I'm seeing the exact same thing over and over again, just a different girl. And to be honest it's starting to get a bit boring. Can't someone do something different at least? Possibly by not making us readers feel slightly inferior.

On a lighter note I've been having a brilliant time while at home. The past few nights I've been to The Bitter End accompanied by dearest Ricky. Safe to say I'm back in the swing of his mocking tones and "I like you Emma, you're alright" whenever he has said something offensive. I've missed that to be honest. Managed to bump into some old faces, some quite fickle and others rather surprised to see me again. Which was nice. Remind me never to use the word nice again. It's shit. So yes I have a fair few plans coming up with some, which include various shopping trips, an art gallery with Joe and more pub outings for sure. Then before you know it I'll be back in Southampton to see the boy and the girls. I can't wait for that to be fair.

Pointless little insight for you here, but I have fizzy feet. I've had my legs crossed for far too long!

Anyone Can Dig a Hole But It Takes a Real Man to Call It Home

2008-12-16T22:21:00.006Z

I can honestly say home is way different to when I left for Southampton. My whole house has been redecorated and I've been relegated to the box room while my sister has my old room with the double bed and such. Boo hiss. But I'm not home that much so it does make sense. Besides my new room is lovely and homely.

So, I arrived back home on Saturday and unpacked all of my belongings, 95% of of which constituted of clothes which needed washing. Didn't get to spend much time with Mum and Pete as they had a Christmas work do to attend. Anyway Saturday night was very boring. Sunday I went Lakeside shopping centre with my mother and had a general browse. Also got to see my darling Ricky Hayward for around 10 minutes while he was working. It was slightly awkward as I need to get used to his banter again. He can be very sarcastic and piss taking at times. The remainder of Sunday passed with seeing my Grandparents and my Nan. Oh how I have missed them.

Yesterday(Monday) consisted of me getting on a bus which albeit a very normal task for people turned out to just baffle me. Firstly I didn't have enough money on my oyster card to pay for the fare so I had to pay with cash but I had no idea where to put my money..so after a few minutes that as sorted. Soon as I sit down the bus starts talking and telling you what bus it is where it's going and what stop it is currently at. How odd. Don't get this in Southampton. God it's changed a bit in 3 months. Eventually made it to Romford which was jam packed with OAPs, chavs and girls who look like wotsits with legs.(They were that orange!) Got a few bits for Christmas and something to wear for the VI Form Presentation evening back at college. The evening turned out lovely. Was fantastic to see everyone from college again. Pictures are on facebook. I won't divulge as it was drunken banter as normal except this time dave got his testicles out and the picture nearly got me banned from facebook. Oops.

Oh today I made a cake. Banana cake. There is so much of it left it's unreal.

The Comedown

2008-12-09T09:21:00.006Z

Without a doubt these past few weeks have consisted of me being very ill. Right now typing is quite the chore as my hands are so clammy. I spent the majority of last night tossing and turning because my head was throbbing so much and I was uncontrollably shaking. I had a lovely fever, yet I was freezing hence the pyjamas, dressing gown, socks and two layers of duvets. Great. I just want one week to go by where I feel okay for once. According to Clare's mum I had something called a stomach migraine where my onslaught of womanhood triggers a migraine.
I have drunk copious amounts of water, so much that it'll be coming out of my ears. Eurgh. I despise being ill.

Today I'm meant to be having a Christmas social with the whole of the English course. So hopefully I'll feel a better by then. I have slept so much last night that I cannot bear to lay down any longer. I hate being ill and I hate the taste of Alka-Seltzer(disposable tablets). Nice return to childhood I can tell you that much!

Yesterday. Today. Tomorrow. Everyday the same.

2008-11-05T18:29:00.006Z

I'm being really slack when it comes to writing blogs lately. Since I've actually been here in Soton I've only managed to write one.

Although I'm thoroughly enjoying uni I can't help but sit at home and think a few things through. What if thing's were different? What if I went somewhere else, a different uni perhaps? But of course that isn't the way. Nor is it going to change. So I must persist and bite the bullet.

The workload is gradually increasing while my motivation is in a decline. With three assessments due to be handed over in about three weeks. And you know what, I've done no work for any of them, let alone the majority of my weekly tasks. Brilliant.

More and more I'm starting to miss the company of my best friend. The general banter and silly jokes. They were amazing times. And I cannot wait until Christmas to see him and others again.

Plethora of grief

2008-09-12T18:20:00.006+01:00

Morose is how you could describe my mood right now.
I've not cried for a good while now. Soon as I step through the door after a forty minute walk home from Romford I'm hit by bad news and grievances. Great-Grandad Vic died this morning after a heart-attack while in hospital. I've never had to lose a grandparent I knew before, and to be honest I don't want it to happen again. Grandad Jim died when I was seven, and I never really knew him, saw him about three times. So in a way Great Grandad Vic made up for someone who I never really had.

In all honesty I'm not so lucky on the Grand-parents front. My fathers parents live abroad in Spain for the majority of the year. My mothers mother, Nanny Pat who I absolutely adore is half paralysed from a previous series of strokes, God forbid what I will be like when she departs.

I dread to think.
I refuse to.

Magnificently serene

2008-09-07T23:05:00.006+01:00

I'm getting through Michael Ondaatje's The English Patient rather swiftly. It's beautifully written I can say that much so far. It's one of those books you don't want to end.

So in 12 days I'll be living in my lovely abode with Clare, Tess, Liz and Sonal.
The reason I'm having to live in a house with four other girls is due to Southampton Solent not having enough room in halls! Stupid I know. So about two hundred and more students have had to rent houses or rooms and such. But the up side is that I will have a double bed and not a rabbit hutch for a room. I simply cannot wait. My bedroom at the current moment in time could easily be mistaken for a mini IKEA. Pots, pans, bedding, cutlery, crockery, photo frames, wall hangings, glasses, bins, chairs, clothes horse, condiments and whatnot. It's ridiculous in here!!

Slowly but surely my time at the Pier in Romford is coming to an end. As much as I hated the job back in January 2007 it actually hasn't been too bad. Besides I may just end up working with company when I move down to Soton.

This week has consisted of a fair amount of thinking, what with the comings and goings of all my fellow friends. I've said it before and I shall say it again I am going to miss so many people. So in that case the next two weeks will consist of seeing them all and taking a panapoly of snapshots that I can treasure for years to come.

"For echo is the soul of the voice exciting itself in hollow places."

In Memory

2008-08-31T22:21:00.013+01:00

Arrived at the ever so charming Monto Water Rats, which is a splendid little venue where one would go to see their friends upcoming band and not the all star lineup of Black Lungs. You could say that I was pretty darn star-struck. Which for the record I was.
Wade MacNeil the frontman of Black Lungs was accompanied by George Petit (both of Alexisonfire) Liam Cormier of Cancer Bats on drums and Haris Cehajic of Moneen on synths and keyboard. Oh it was a match made in heaven. Pardon the cliche.

I've done a lot of thinking lately. Some thoughts being positive and others highly negative. The majority negative. University is so close now. Twenty days away in fact and the thought of leaving my closest friends is really scaring me. I've only just realised how much they mean to me, how much I doted on them, how much I'm going to miss them. Everyone is now at a turning point in their lives, be it employment or further education. Regardless I wish everyone the best and look forward to seeing you all whenever possible.

Southampton is going to be testing. I've never had to live on my own, I know everyone living in halls is in the same situation but the prospect is shit scary. Although meeting new people, making a whole bunch of new friends and moving on is welcomed greatly. Lets just see how it all turns out.

Moderate bliss. Moderated bliss.

2008-08-24T23:29:00.006+01:00

I am in my element right now.
Perfect.

An Ode To...

2008-08-19T22:40:00.008+01:00

Okay so results day didn't go to plan and I'm not going to Royal Holloway anymore.
But I really don't care.
I got an unconditional offer from the University of Essex, but there is no way I am going there.
So I am still waiting for the arseholes to put me into clearing.

On a lighter note I have been offered places at Brighton, University of Surrey, Southampton Solent and Brunel.
I'm going with Southampton Solent. BA English & Media Arts..

This is such a boring blog..

I returned from Crete today. Without a doubt it was the longest two weeks of my life.
I've never read so many books in so little time.

Stephen Fry - The Stars Tennis Balls....TWICE
Peter Robinson - Aftermath
Frederick Raphael - Glittering Prizes
Danny Wallace - Friends like these
Barack Obama - Audacity of Hope
Matthew Sweet - Shepperton Babylon
Ben Elton -The First Casualty
Ben Elton - Stark
Ben Elton - Popcorn
Ben Elton - Past Mortem

Yes I know what your thinking...'Ben Elton...four of his books...just why?'
But seriously...what else do you do when you don't have a hire car and you have hour upon hour of free time.
Safe to say it helped pass time.

These two weeks also made me think a lot more on the friendship frontier.
My mind is made up.
Anyway September is only round the corner and I shall be moving into Solent and meeting a whole load of new people. Except for Pierce who happens to be going there too.
But FUCK...I am going to miss some people I hold dear to my heart. So with that in mind I purchased a photo album from a small boutique while away, and shall therefore pack it with snapshots of those whom I treasure the most.

Another thing...well I shall make this the last.
I found a box the other week, it had all the sentimental items we shared.
Even the first rose you ever bought me which I pressed. It's still in perfect condition you know, as well as the cards and poems.

Status Quo

2008-08-04T23:32:00.006+01:00

Well this will be my last blog for like 2 weeks as I'm off to Crete with the family tomorrow morning at like 4am. So, make the most of it kids.
Do I know a single word in Greek...No. This should be amusing to say the least.
But I shan't proceed any further on this subject as when I come back I'm going to have a blog about that.

14th August is swiftly approaching. D-Day.
Touch wood when Ricky calls it will be "Emma you have your A in English...You're going RHUL!!!"
One can live in hope. Until then I shall be on tenterhooks.

So as some of you may know the whole friendship front is rather disputatious at the moment.
But lets just see it as the opening of new doors, and those who enter have so far proved to be magnificent. As for those who never stepped over the threshold...well they are the ones who mean the absolute most to me. My best friend Ricky has never once left my side. My male counterpart you could say. Yes male counterpart indeed. "United we stand. Divided we fall". Even though I love that quote he has yet to let me fall alone, and to be honest hasn't let me fall far. So for that I am eternally grateful.

In all everything right now is just poochy. I'm in the best position I can possibly be in, and you know what it's only going to get better. So fuck you to whoever doubted me, blamed me and hurt me. But I'm putting my foot down now. I'm in control. This is my life and I have it all planned out.

Beggars at the feast

2008-08-01T15:22:00.007+01:00

This blogging lark is getting way too regular now...Emma you need to lay off it for a bit.
There won't be much consistency in this one today...or anything of much interest for that matter.

So prank calls and voicemails have made an appearance on my phone.
How charming that 18 year olds are resorting to the tactics of a child.
And I thought we were all meant to mature as years go on.
Gotta love the guts...

13 days until results day kids.
Anyone else shitting a brick?

Betrayal. The defining trait of humanity

2008-07-28T22:08:00.008+01:00

I don't have much to say for a change.
But I believe the title of this blog is powerful enough.

Return of the juggernaut

2008-07-26T15:49:00.004+01:00

One of the biggest issues I have is slowly creeping back into my life.
Crushing the smidgen of confidence I seem to have gained.
It's about time I done something about it.
Everyone tells me I have no reason to worry but it still overpowers the other things in my mind.
I know I shouldn't worry about it at all.
More so I'm pretty sure many of you can associate with me in regards to wanting to better yourself, be it image or personality.
This is my downfall, the narcissistic view of myself.

Barefaced audacity

2008-07-22T19:33:00.010+01:00

Reasons are implausible.
Gratification's non existent.
You are the antithesis of the norm.

Get over it.

Quiet persistence of a dream

2008-07-20T23:56:00.007+01:00

It's only when you are tested that you find out who you truly are.

Well that sums things up quite clearly.
Let us remain reserved and civilized.
I know exactly who I want to be.
I know exactly how I will achieve it.

Never again do I want to feel that alone and helpless.
There is no way I am going to go through that again.
Funny how things change in a flash.

In just under two months I will be moving into my accommodation at RHUL.
I am fucking ecstatic. Of course this is all dependent on my grades.
Nonetheless this will be a major turning point in my life.
The people I live with with in the next three years will be the people I will cherish forever.
Only a small handful of my current friends will be privileged enough to also be a part of this eternal friendship.
We ride.

3 steps forward and 3 steps back

2008-07-05T23:46:00.002+01:00

Ricky is always right.

Let's go out in style

2008-06-30T10:22:00.009+01:00

Leavers was one for the memories.
I was pretty drunk to remember most of it but from what I do recall it was the dogs.
The food wasn't too dapper, but hello free bar.

A select few in VI Form have had a large impact on my life. You special few have helped shape me to be who I am today, whether it be good or bad. You stabilize me when I'm hysterical, pick me up from my lowest of lows, laugh at my lewd personality and most importantly accept me.

Personally I can see a vast change in who I was two years ago as to who I am now. Yes I'm cocky, witty and downright rude but isn't that better than the girl who took everything seriously and just looked at the ground during Year 12? I think so.
Wow. I can't actually believe it's over.
Fuck I'm going to miss it.

We now all face the turning points in our lives. University.
With us all gallivanting in different directions across the United Kingdom it's hard to say who I will definitely keep in touch with, by all means I will try my best, but after all it's a two way thing. Secondly I wish the best of luck to those who happen to be in a relationship at this moment in time, it's going to be hard for you lot, just remember the magic word: Trust.
After all it's all you will have half the time, without that there might as well be nothing.

This isn't the end, in fact this is just a passageway to another door. One starts to close and the other is wide open.
Let's embrace these opportunities that lie ahead.
Most importantly let us never forget the memories we shared.

Thank you so much.
I love you all so dearly.

Don't Stop

2008-06-21T20:43:00.011+01:00

What with exams now over I should be out there celebrating.
But you know what...It really doesn't seem that big of a deal that I never have to go back to VI Form ever again. In fact I'm rather disheartened by it. There are so many people that I'm going to miss, and many more that I probably won't end up seeing that much, except for the odd gathering.

Friday 27th is going to be one for the memories. I've promised myself to not cry, but guaranteed as soon as 'Wonderwall' and 'Don't Look Back in Anger' are played and I'm surrounded by all my closest friends I will burst into tears. Obviously I will see them again...but not as much. After all we are all going our separate ways.

The 2 years in VI Form have obviously had their advantages and disadvantages, and God am I going to miss it!

I actually don't know what to do with myself right now. Already I've watched 5 movies in two days...I feel I should be doing some college work of some sort...But it's over. Well and truly over.

All that's left now is to get my results. Let's just hope I achieved and excelled in my subjects. Then it's off to uni in September. This is when my life really will change, on all levels.

Anticipation

2008-06-19T10:06:00.007+01:00

Today is going to be one of the most important days in my life so far.

At 1:30pm I shall be sat in a drafty hall in St. Bons sitting my Post 1945 Synoptic paper for English Literature.
This is the make or break of my future.
I'm confident I will do well, even if it means purging all of my knowledge (as long as it refers back to the question....I know) on to the joyous 8 page or 16 page answer book.

I need to nail this paper.
I need to get into Holloway.
I need September to happen. September after all is what's driving me.

As Edward Bond said : "We are pessimists by experience, but optimists by nature. I intend to stay true to my nature."

Let's do this shit.